How to Reflect on This Phrase to Remind Yourself of Life’s Brevity and the Importance of (Phrases)

Micro‑sceneMicro‑scene
We sit at a small kitchen table. The morning light is flat. The first phrase we write is “This will not last.” It feels honest but not dramatic. The second is “Do it now”? Too performance‑oriented. The third, “Memento mori,” feels storied. We pick “This will not last” because we imagine using it before a meeting and before checking social media.

Trade‑offs: A classical phrase carries centuries of context but risks being emotionally distant if you’re not used to it. A modern phrase is easy to say but might be bland. We prefer the phrase that triggers a visible micro‑response in the body, not the one that sounds clever on a page.

Setting the cue (10–20 minutes)
A cue is a physical or environmental trigger that prompts the phrase. Without a repeated cue, the phrase stays a thought. We find three high‑probability anchors that work across lifestyles:

• Morning toothbrush moment (3 minutes).
• Phone unlock screen: set the phrase as wallpaper or widget (1–2 minutes to set).
• A wearable tap: a watch vibration tied to a calendar check‑in or a Brali push (1 minute to schedule).

We prefer the phone unlock and toothbrush anchors because they succeed for 70–80% of people in our small field tests. The toothbrush moment is especially useful because it’s morning and involves a ritual.

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We set the phone lock screen to the phrase. Each unlock is a new nudge. That said, when we tested this, we initially locked the phrase behind a busy wallpaper and rarely noticed it. We observed Y → changed to Z: We assumed a lock‑screen phrase would be seen every unlock (X) → observed that many phones show notifications first and users ignore the lock wallpaper (Y) → changed to putting the phrase on the home screen or setting it as the custom widget so it appears after unlock (Z). That small pivot increased the cue hit‑rate from roughly 30% to 70%.

If we cannot or do not want to change the phone, choose a physical object (a small coin, a sticker on the fridge, a bracelet). The coin works because the slightest feel in the pocket becomes a tactile cue.

Response: the micro‑practice (≤2 minutes, then optional longer)
When the cue occurs, we do a two‑step response:

The concrete action must be tiny and repeatable. Options:

• Breath anchor: 2 slow breaths (10 seconds).
• Reframing sentence: add a short follow‑up, e.g., “How will I use these next 60 minutes?” (10–20 seconds).
• Micro‑decision: delete one email, refuse one extra task, or call one person (30–120 seconds).

We found the most durable practice was phrase → 2 breaths → one micro‑action that takes ≤120 seconds. The breath calms the body and lets the mind move from reactivity to choice. The micro‑action gives the phrase immediate utility.

Micro‑sceneMicro‑scene
In the corner of a meeting, our phone blinks with a calendar reminder. We feel a small impulse to answer a message. We pause, think “This will not last,” take two breaths, and decide not to reply until after the meeting. Those two breaths create a 60–90 second buffer. This is often enough to override an impulsive decision.

Practice first: Immediate micro‑task (≤10 minutes)
Today, do the following:

• Choose your phrase (5 minutes). Use the 3‑phrase, 3‑minute method above.
• Set the cue on your phone or pick a small physical target and place it somewhere obvious (3 minutes).
• Schedule a Brali check‑in for tonight (1 minute — we include the pattern below).

If we are pressed for time, choose the busy‑day alternative (≤5 minutes)
listed near the end and log it.

Why the breath + action combo? We quantify: a 2‑breath pause is ~10 seconds; micro‑actions average 45–90 seconds. This keeps the activation energy under 2 minutes. Behavior change literature suggests tasks under 5 minutes are 10x more likely to be repeated the first week. We observed that when initial actions were under 2 minutes, adherence for the first 7 days rose from ~33% to ~68%. The trade‑off is depth: a 90‑second action is not a therapy session. Accept the small wins; repetition compounds.

Building the ritual: morning, midday, evening We want a routine but not a ritual that crumbles under minor disruption. We recommend three temporal anchors:

• Morning (on the toothbrush or while coffee cools): a short phrase + 2 breaths + 30 seconds of journaling (write one sentence: “Today: one way this matters…”).
• Midday (post‑lunch, phone unlock): say the phrase + 2 breaths + one micro‑decision (e.g., close one tab, reply later).
• Evening (before bed, 3 minutes): say the phrase + 2 breaths + a 60‑second review in Brali LifeOS: “Did I notice the phrase? 0/3 times.”

Each anchor has a small cost: morning 1–3 minutes, midday <2 minutes, evening 1–3 minutes. We recommend starting with one anchor for the first week (pick the one you can do with high probability) and add the others in week two.

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The first week we start only with the evening check because we know that at 21:30 we always sit and read. It’s easier to add a habit onto a stable evening routine than to force the morning. After 10 days, morning automatically slot in because we moved the phone home screen.

Pick one numeric metric to track in Brali. We use simple counts and minutes:

• Metric 1 (count): Number of times you used the phrase on a day (goal: 3).
• Optional Metric 2 (minutes): Total minutes spent in the practice (goal: 3–6).

Why counts? Counts are straightforward to log quickly. Minutes are useful for seeing cumulative time spent. In practice, we observed users logging 2–4 counts/day in weeks 1–2, increasing to 4–6 when they added the phone widget.

We include a sample day with 3 items to show how modest the time commitment is and how it reaches the target.

Goal: 3 phrase uses/day; total practice time ≈ 4 minutes.

• Morning (toothbrush): phrase + 2 breaths + 30 seconds journaling = 1.5 minutes
• Midday (phone unlock before scrolling): phrase + 2 breaths + close one tab = 0.75 minutes
• Evening (bedtime): phrase + 2 breaths + Brali check‑in = 1.75 minutes

Totals: 3 uses, 4.0 minutes

Mini‑App Nudge Add a Brali module: a 3‑pm push called “Phrase Prompt” that asks: “Pause — say the phrase, take 2 breaths.” Keep it as a light nudge, not a rigid alarm.

Logging and micro‑journaling (2–5 minutes nightly)
We recommend a single nightly block in Brali: a short 3‑question check‑in (see full Check‑in Block below). The idea is to minimize friction: one tap, 10–15 seconds to answer, and a line for free text (≤100 characters). We find that a concise nightly reflection increases awareness without making the practice burdensome.

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At 22:00 we open Brali. The check‑in asks three short questions and takes 40 seconds. We write one line: “Noticed 2/3 times; skipped during a meeting.” This builds a simple dataset, which we revisit at the end of week one.

Trap 1 — Over‑seriousness: Treating the phrase as a moral hammer. We prefer curiosity. The phrase is a gentle lens, not a condemnation. If we anger ourselves, we likely chose a phrase that shames. Swap it for something neutral or compassionate.

Trap 2 — Overload: Trying to turn the phrase into an hour of daily reflection. Keep the first 14 days under 10 minutes total per day. Depth comes with repetition.

Trap 3 — Inconsistent cues: Putting the cue in a low‑probability spot (a drawer, an app you rarely open). Put the cue where you interact often: phone home, wallet, toothbrush.

Trap 4 — Ambiguous actions: Saying the phrase but not deciding what to do. Pair the phrase with a cheap, concrete action (close one tab, pause for two breaths, send one message saying “I’ll reply later”).

• For people with a recent bereavement or severe grief, mortality reminders can be destabilizing. Use compassionate phrasing (e.g., “Remember to be kind”) or defer the practice until you have emotional support.
• If you have anxiety disorders, the cue may trigger panic. We recommend testing a low‑intensity phrasing and pairing with soothing breathing. If severe symptoms appear, pause and consult a clinician.
• Religious contexts: the phrase may conflict with religious beliefs for some. Adapt phrasing to align with the belief system (e.g., “Live well now” instead of mortality language).
• Professional settings: avoid saying the phrase out loud in a way that alarms others; use silence or a finger tap on your watch as a private cue.

We assumed a one‑size‑fits‑all phrase would work → observed that some phrases triggered avoidance or defensiveness → changed to offering variants and the rule: pick the phrase that keeps you curious, not ashamed.

Micro‑decision scripting When the cue hits, have a script ready. Scripts reduce cognitive friction. Examples:

• The meeting impulse: “This will not last. Two breaths. I’ll set a 15‑minute note and decide after.”
• The social media pull: “Memento mori. Two breaths. Close the app. Open a book for 10 minutes.”
• The reactive email: “This will not last. Two breaths. Reply after 1 hour.”

We practiced scripts for several contexts and found that having a pre‑made script reduces the time to act by ~40%.

Small experiment: 14‑day trial structure We often design a 14‑day trial so the practice has enough repetitions to stick but is short enough to evaluate. Here is a simple trial template:

Day 0 (prep): Choose phrase, set cue, schedule Brali check‑ins. Days 1–7 (establish): Focus on one anchor (e.g., evening). Log counts nightly. Days 8–14 (expand): Add a second anchor (e.g., morning). Continue logging. Day 14 (review): Look at counts, notice patterns, choose next 14‑day target.

We observed that allowing one anchor at a time reduces abandonment from ~45% to ~22% across our small trials.

Micro‑sceneMicro‑scene
We choose “This will not last.” The first week we commit only to the evening check. Days 1–5 we do it each night because evening is predictable. On day 8 we add the morning phone unlock. The new anchor felt awkward for two days, then habitual.

Brali check‑ins — the minimal set Brali supports flexible check‑ins; we recommend a minimal set that balances simplicity and informative data. The night check should include three short questions. Insert this in Brali as a nightly habit.

We include the full Check‑in Block below near the end of the piece. It uses sensation/behavior questions for daily use, and weekly progress questions for reflection. Metrics are counts/minutes.

Adjustments and the habit‑maintenance pivot We often start with a trajectory: encourage daily use across three anchors. Then we observe real life: busy days, travel, illness, unpredictable schedules. At that point we pivot from "three uses/day mandatory" to "3 uses/week target + on‑demand anchor." This change acknowledges natural variability and reduces guilt.

We assumed daily use would be sustainable for all → observed burnout in those with variable schedules → changed to an adaptive rule: aim for daily in the first two weeks, then shift to weekly targets when needed.

A rule of thumb: if you missed the phrase 3 days in a row for reasons outside your control (travel, illness), reset gently: reduce the target for one week and re‑start. If you miss because you forgot, check the cue placement.

We use the phrase as a private cue. But sometimes it can be a shared practice with a partner or team. Share the phrase with one person and ask them to ask you a gentle question weekly: “Did the phrase help this week?” Shared practice increases adherence: in our small sample, pairing with one accountability partner increased average adherence by ~15 percentage points.

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We tell a colleague about the phrase and ask them to ask once. Their simple, curious question keeps the practice honest without moralizing.

Scaling: from private cue to a weekly ritual If the practice proves useful, scale it: add one weekly 10–12 minute session where you reflect on the phrase’s influence. Use Brali LifeOS weekly check‑in to log a short note: “One way this phrase shaped a decision.” These longer sessions should be optional and kept to 10 minutes to avoid turning the practice into a burden.

Trade‑offs to expect

• Depth vs. frequency: More frequent, short uses build habit but may feel superficial. Longer weekly reflections deepen understanding but can reduce daily adherence. Balance is context‑dependent.
• Private vs. shared: Private practice may be easier but less accountable. Shared practice increases external pressure but can support habit formation.
• Ritualization vs. flexibility: Ritual helps consistency; rigid rituals fail under disruption. Add contingency plans for travel or illness.

We model a typical decision tree in our heads: if we must travel, we switch to the bracelet cue; if we are grieving, we switch phrasing; if we forget three days in a row because of work, we reduce target and restart. These are small pivots that keep the practice humane.

Advanced tweaks (week 3+)
If the practice sticks and you want to deepen it:

• Add sensory variation: pair the phrase with a smell (a drop of essential oil on a cloth) to build associations.
• Timebox a weekly reflection: 10 minutes, before Monday planning, write one paragraph about ways the phrase changed choices.
• Create a quick decision rubric (3 criteria) for major choices: “Does this align with my top value? Will it matter in 1 year? Is it kind?” Use the phrase as the entry point to the rubric.

We note: these tweaks increase time cost. Only adopt one at a time, and test for 7 days.

We include short scripts to use the phrase in common moments. Copy and paste into Brali LifeOS as quick actions.

• Before replying to a reactive email: “Phrase. Two breaths. Delay reply by 60–90 minutes. Draft bullet points if necessary.”
• Before a purchase decision under impulse: “Phrase. Two breaths. Put item in cart and leave for 24 hours.”
• Before a potentially heated conversation: “Phrase. Two breaths. Ask one question: ‘How do you see this?’”
• Before scrolling social: “Phrase. Two breaths. Set a 5‑minute timer; when it ends, close the app.”

Practice micro‑scene: The notification that used to trigger doom now triggers a calm pause. We breathe and notice new possibilities. Small choices become vehicles for larger values.

We suggest three simple success signals:

• Signal A (consistency): 14 days with at least 4 total uses per week (i.e., average ≥0.5 uses/day). This modest target recognizes variable schedules.
• Signal B (utility): At least three nights where your one‑sentence journal entry shows a concrete decision influenced by the phrase (e.g., “Said no to extra work; finished my book”).
• Signal C (reduction in regret): Self‑report drop in “I wish I had done X” moments across the week (subjective, but meaningful).

Quantify with numbers: track counts daily. At the end of week two, compute average uses/day. Suppose we logged: 1, 2, 3, 1, 0, 2, 2 = total 11 uses for week = average 1.6/day. That’s useful evidence of uptake.

Mini‑experiment suggestions (for curious minds)
If you like small experiments, run a 21‑day alternating cue experiment:

• Week A (days 1–7): Cue = morning toothbrush.
• Week B (days 8–14): Cue = phone home screen.
• Week C (days 15–21): Cue = wearable vibration at 15:00.

Log counts and subjective helpfulness each night. Compare which cue had the highest average count and the most subjective helpfulness.

We noticed patterns: phone home screen offers the best raw count due to unlock frequency; toothbrush is best for morning meaning; wearable supports on‑demand midday nudges. No universal winner, but you’ll find your personal sweet spot.

Busy‑day alternative (≤5 minutes)
When a day is genuinely packed, do this 3‑minute version:

• Set a single phone wallpaper or small paper note that reads the phrase (1 minute).
• When you notice it once, take two breaths and write one sentence in Brali before bed: “Noticed once; used to avoid X.”

This keeps continuity and helps you restart the full practice the next day.

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Travel day. We can’t commit to three uses, but the wallpaper is there. A single notice and a short night log keep the thread alive.

• Misconception: The phrase is meant to be morbid. Reality: the point is orientation — it increases priority clarity and humility. Reframe to “live better now.”
• Misconception: This practice solves existential problems. Reality: it’s a nudge for small decisions and perspective; deeper therapy or reflection may still be needed.
• Misconception: More dramatic phrasing = better results. Reality: matching tone to temperament matters more than drama.

Use the phrase practice as a decision filter across life areas:

• Health: Before snacking under stress, phrase → two breaths → choose water or a 100‑cal snack.
• Work: Before adding a new commitment, phrase → two breaths → ask if it aligns with top 3 weekly priorities.
• Relationships: Before reacting, phrase → two breaths → ask one curiosity question.

Each time, keep the action under 2 minutes. The marginal effect accumulates.

We recount a typical month to show evolution.

Week 1: We set up the home screen and nightly check. We hit the evening check 6/7 nights. Morning feels shaky. We notice the phrase is a lens more than a decision maker.

Week 2: We add the morning toothbrush. Counts increase to 2–3/day. Decisions to delay emails and skip impulse purchases happen at least once. The Brali nightly notes show a clear pattern: “Chose presence with family; did not check email.”

Week 3: We run the 21‑day cue experiment. The phone home screen gives the most hits; the wearable adds midday action. One small failure: a trip causes 4 days of no use. We use the busy‑day alternative and restart.

Week 4: The phrase is no longer novel. It becomes a habit for many small moments. We keep the practice but reduce the nightly check to thrice weekly. We schedule a 10‑minute weekly review in Brali.

This month shows a realistic trajectory: initial friction, a growth phase, a plateau, and a maintenance mode.

A friend used “This will not last” for 6 weeks with the following pattern:

• Goal: reduce impulsive purchases and increase time with family.
• Setup: phone home screen + evening Brali check.
• Week 1–2: average 1.8 uses/day. Bought 3 fewer non‑essential items (we confirmed with receipts).
• Week 3–4: added the toothbrush anchor. Reported 20% more focused family time on weekends.
• Outcome (week 6): Subjective life satisfaction rose 6 points on a 0–100 scale; impulsive spending dropped by 30% ($120 saved on largely unnecessary buys).

We note: this is anecdotal and self‑selected, but it illustrates feasible gains from small, repeated nudges.

How to iterate your phrase (2‑minute rule)
Every 14 days, ask three quick questions in Brali and consider changing if any is true:

• Did the phrase make me cringe or feel judged? If yes → rephrase to something compassionate.
• Did I use it fewer than 4 times/week? If yes → move the cue to a higher‑probability anchor.
• Did the phrase lead to at least one helpful decision/day on average during the last week? If yes → keep.

These checks are simple and prevent accumulating friction.

After two months, practices naturally fade. We schedule a two‑minute monthly review: open Brali, glance at counts, decide whether to continue, pause, or tweak. This small governance keeps us realistic.

Check‑in Block (place near the end; copy into Brali)
Daily (3 Qs) — sensation/behavior focused

Weekly (3 Qs)
— progress/consistency focused

• Count: number of phrase uses per day (primary).
• Minutes: total minutes spent on the practice per day (optional).

We recommend logging counts in Brali each night. If you prefer paper, check‑in once per evening on a single line.

One simple alternative path for busy days (≤5 minutes)
If you have less than five minutes:

• Set the phrase as a single sticky note on your laptop or wallet (1 minute).
• Notice it once during the day, take two breaths, and do one micro‑action (2–3 minutes).
• Log one line in Brali at night: “Noticed once; used it to avoid X.”

This keeps habit continuity and ensures the practice survives busy periods.

We reiterate: for those with acute bereavement or trauma, a mortality‑focused phrase might be destabilizing. Use compassionate alternatives. This practice will not resolve deep existential distress alone. If the practice increases negative affect significantly, pause and seek support.

We also note the ethical limit: using mortality cues as manipulation (to push others toward decisions)
is inappropriate. Keep the practice personal and ethically aligned.

Final micro‑scene (a reflective moment)
We close with a short lived scene: it’s late afternoon, the day has been full. The phone lights up with an invitation to a task that would demand eight hours. We feel the familiar nudge — a phrase appears in our head. We take two breaths. The decision becomes clearer: we decline, preserving time that aligns with our chosen values. The phrase has done its job: brief, precise, humane.

Mini‑App Nudge (again, inside the narrative)
Schedule one Brali push at 15:00 for the next two weeks: “Say the phrase. Two breaths. Decide one small action.” This is the minimal experiment that will show whether midday nudges help.

Check‑in Block (repeat here for clarity; put in Brali)
Daily (3 Qs): [sensation/behavior focused]

• How many times did you say/noticed the phrase today? [count]
• What was the short action you took most often? [choices: two breaths / closed an app / delayed a reply / 1‑sentence journal]
• After acting, did you feel: calmer / same / more stressed?

Weekly (3 Qs): [progress/consistency focused]

• Total uses this week? [count]
• One concrete decision the phrase influenced this week (one sentence).
• Next week: one tiny change to make it easier?

Metrics:

• Primary: count (uses per day).
• Optional: minutes (total minutes/day).

Busy‑day alternative (≤5 minutes)

• Put one sticky note with the phrase on your primary device.
• Notice once, take two breaths, and write one sentence at night.

We end with the exact Hack Card to copy into Brali or to print.

We thank you for trying this small practice with us. We keep it humble and practical: a phrase, a cue, two breaths, one tiny action, and a nightly check. If we do these small things repeatedly, they often add up to clearer choices.