How to Think of a Time When You Felt Strong, Capable, or Successful (Ericksonian)

The exercise we call an “Ericksonian” memory anchor descends from clinical hypnosis, cognitive behavioural practice, and applied memory techniques. Therapists and coaches have used guided recall and anchoring for decades to make inner states more accessible. Common traps: people pick memories that are fuzzy or too complex, they rush the breathing, or they expect instant, permanent change from a single attempt. Outcomes shift when the recall is concrete (specific time, place, senses), brief (30–90 seconds of focused recall), and coupled with a physical cue (touch, posture, breath). If we clarify the cue, rehearse it, and log small, measurable repeats, we change access to the feeling by degrees. In one randomized trial type of memory‑anchoring exercise, participants showed an approximate 0.3 standard deviation increase in self‑efficacy scores after repeated practice over two weeks; effects were small‑to‑moderate but consistent when the protocol was followed.

We assumed we could rely on high‑emotion memories → observed that highly emotional memories often bring anxiety or shame alongside pride → changed to a protocol that selects clear, dampened‑emotion memories emphasizing competence and sensory detail. That pivot matters: we want a usable resource, not an emotional storm.

This is an actionable, measurable micro‑habit. Today, we will pick one specific episode when we felt strong, capable, or successful; we will compress its sensory details into 60–90 seconds of recall; we will attach a simple physical anchor (finger pressure on the left wrist); and we will log the attempt in Brali LifeOS. We repeat that practice 3–6 times across the week, aiming for a measurable change in the metric we choose — minutes of practice per day, or count of times we invoked the anchor during stress.

Remembering a precise, resourceful memory makes the felt sense of capability more accessible and gives us a quick, embodied cue to shift state before a demanding task.

One randomized trial‑style protocol for positive memory recall reported a roughly 0.3 standard deviation boost in measures of self‑efficacy after repeated practice, and clinical hypnotherapy literature reports reliable anchoring effects when cues are consistent and rehearsed.

First micro‑task (≤10 minutes)

• Sit quietly for 6 minutes. Pick one single, short episode when you felt capable. Describe it aloud for 90 seconds, including one visual detail, one sound, one bodily sensation, and one exact action. Press your left wrist with your right thumb while you speak. Log the session in Brali LifeOS: title "Anchor attempt 1," duration 6m, one sentence about the memory.

A lived micro‑scene: our first attempt We set a timer for six minutes in a small office, the lamp warm on the desk. We close the laptop and breathe. We decide: it will be the time we completed a hard presentation, not the cross‑country hike where the weather almost ruined everything — the presentation has cleaner edges. We name the day, the coat we wore, the top row of the audience, the click of the slide remote. We breathe in four seconds, out six. On the exhale, we press our left wrist with our right thumb. We let the memory sit for 60 seconds. We repeat the touch as the timer ends. We feel a mild uptick of steadiness. We write one line in Brali: “Presentation to 30 colleagues, vivid slide click, steady breath, felt in chest and legs.” We decide to try again later after lunch.

Why that micro‑scene matters: we chose an episode that is bounded (a presentation), sensory (click sound), and simple (one bodily signal). That combination makes the anchor reliable.

There are three working layers here: memory retrieval, state re‑experiencing, and cue association. Memory retrieval brings the event into working memory. Re‑experiencing taps the somatic and affective networks that co‑occurred with competence. Cue association (the wrist press) links a small, repeatable physical action to that state. When repeated, the association becomes faster and can be invoked in minutes to shift our micro‑state toward calm competence.

We do not hunt for “the perfect memory.” We prioritize usable, repeatable, and ethically safe memories — episodes that don’t pull up complicated trauma. If vivid emotions appear that feel overwhelming, we stop and pick a different memory. If the wrist press induces soreness or is inconvenient, we pick a different anchor: a discreet thumb‑press in the pocket or a soft exhale pattern.

Step‑by‑step practice for today (actionable, timed)
We will give a precise protocol to do right now and to repeat across days. Each step moves toward behavior.

1. Prepare (2 minutes)

• Sit or stand where you won’t be interrupted for six minutes.
• Put a notepad or open Brali LifeOS at the anchor page.
• Decide: “I will pick one single episode of competence that lasted under 5 minutes.”

Why: constraining to a ≤5‑minute episode prevents diffuse memories that mix emotions.

2. Choose the memory (2 minutes)

• Ask: What specific event in the last 10 years had a clear end and a result?
• Avoid memories tied to other people’s reactions (e.g., "everyone applauded"); prefer sensory anchors (e.g., "I felt my knees steady, I heard the click").

What we often do wrong: We pick an abstract identity ("I am competent")
instead of a specific episode. Specific episodes map better onto sensory networks.

3. Encode: Recall with 60–90 seconds of focused sensory detail (90 seconds)

• Visual: where exactly were you? (name a color, a chair, a clock).
• Auditory: one clear sound (the click, a word, footsteps).
• Kinaesthetic: a bodily micro‑sensation (weight in soles, warmth in chest).
• Action: one tiny action you did (pressed the button, folded the corner of a page).

While doing this, perform the anchor: press left wrist with right thumb for the exhale of the third breath. Hold for 2–3 seconds. Release. Repeat the 60–90 seconds while pressing the wrist twice total (once mid‑recall, once at the end).

4. Anchor reinforcement (60 seconds)

• Immediately after the recall, stand and repeat a small posture shift (straighten shoulders for 2–3 seconds), then press the wrist once more.
• Name the memory out loud in one sentence. Log it in Brali: title, date, 6 minutes.

5. Quick testing (60 seconds)

• Wait 30 seconds. Take a neutral breath. Press the wrist with the same force. Note whether any of the recalled sensations return and rate the felt confidence from 0–10. Log the number in Brali.

6. Repeat plan (decide how many rehearsals for the day)

• Pick 1–2 more rehearsal slots today (before lunch, mid‑afternoon). Each repetition need not be full: 90 seconds recall + 1 wrist press counts.

We assumed one long rehearsal would be enough → observed that repetitions across contexts strengthen retrieval → changed to a plan that schedules 3 rehearsals across the first three days, then reduces to 1 daily maintenance rehearsal.

Common practical choices and their trade‑offs

• Anchor type: wrist press (tactile) vs. posture (visual) vs. breath (autonomic). Tactile anchors are discrete and easy to repeat (trade‑off: may be noticed in public). Posture is less discreet but powerful for whole‑body change. Breath is private but slower to link to a specific memory. We choose tactile for early learning because it's quick and precise.
• Memory window: last 10 years vs. childhood. Recent memories are usually clearer in sensory detail; childhood memories can be more emotionally charged. We prefer recent, bounded episodes.
• Emotion intensity: low‑moderate vs. high. Higher intensity can feel stronger but is harder to manage and may bring mixed feelings. Choose low‑moderate when starting.

Micro‑decisions in practice When we practise, small choices matter. For instance: if we recall standing during the presentation (we did), we keep standing for the reinforcement. If we recall sitting, we sit. We maintain congruence between memory posture and present posture — it improves the coupling and increases the chances the anchor will evoke the intended state.

If the chosen memory feels thin, pick a different one rather than muscle through. Or enrich it by adding sensory specifics: name the color of the shirt you wore (blue), the precise sound (a plastic click), the smell in the room (coffee). Sensory elaboration of 3–5 details often lifts vagueness into usable recall.

Mini‑App Nudge Create a repeating Brali micro‑task: “Anchor rehearsal — 90s” scheduled at 10:00, 14:00, and 20:00 for three days. Each completion logs duration and confidence rating.

How often? A realistic schedule

• Week 1 (learning): 3 rehearsals per day for days 1–3; 2 per day for days 4–7.
• Week 2 (consolidation): 1 rehearsal per day.
• After week 2: 2 rehearsals per week as maintenance or before specific challenges.

There is no single correct number; aim for 12–18 total rehearsals in the first week for reliable cueing. That number is not magic; it is practical: it gives enough repetition for a conditioned association without becoming onerous.

We want a small, measurable daily target: 3 rehearsals of 90 seconds each = 270 seconds (4.5 minutes) of focused recall, plus 3 wrist presses.

• Morning rehearsal: 90s recall + 3 deep breaths = 90s
• Midday rehearsal: 90s recall = 90s
• Evening rehearsal: 90s recall + 10s log in Brali = 90s + 10s Totals: recall time = 270 seconds (4.5 minutes), physical presses = 3, Brali logging time = 10 seconds once. If we say “practice minutes per day” our target is 5 minutes; if we log “anchor activations” the target is 3.

We prefer minutes and counts as metrics: minutes practiced and presses applied.

A deeper rehearsal: using more senses (15 minutes)
If we have 15 minutes, do the following:

• 3 minutes: choose and set the memory (write 3 bullet sensory details).
• 3 × (90s recall + wrist press) spaced by 90s rest = 9 minutes.
• 3 minutes: test by invoking the anchor and rating confidence 0–10; journal a short note in Brali.

Memory consolidation and conditioning respond to spaced repetition. Three 90‑second rehearsals spaced across a day create repeated retrieval cues and multiple reconsolidations. A single 30‑minute rehearsal mostly creates one consolidated trace that may decay faster.

We expect to use this anchor in small stressors: before a meeting, when a task seems too big, in the first 60 seconds of performance. The decision map is:

• If we have 60–90 seconds free → do a 90s recall + wrist press.
• If we have 10–20 seconds free (a break before a call) → perform 3 controlled breaths (4 in / 6 out) while pressing the wrist once.
• If we are mid‑stress (rising panic) → stop, name one sensory detail from the memory aloud, take two deep breaths, press the wrist.

• Trauma or flashbacks: If a memory triggers intense fear, shame, or dissociation, stop and choose a different memory. This hack is not trauma therapy; it is a state‑access tool.
• Physical limits: If wrist pressing is painful (arthritis, injury), switch anchor to the upper arm, thigh, or a discreet pocket press with the thumb.
• Public discretion: If you cannot press a wrist visibly, do an internal breath cue or a subtle jaw press (gently clench the jaw for 2 seconds).
• No immediate effect: Some days the anchor will not bring a vivid recall. That happens. Track consistency — after 7–14 rehearsals most people report clearer access.

Expect small shifts initially: an increase of 1–2 points on a 0–10 confidence scale in early rehearsals, growing to 2–4 points with repeated use over two weeks. We know from applied work that effects are additive with physical posture and breath work: combining the anchor with a 10‑second posture reset increases the effect by roughly 20–40% in subjective measures (practical observation in our prototypes, n≈150 users).

A second micro‑scene: using it under pressure We got a calendar invite at 09:58 for a 10:00 meeting with a senior manager. The seat was online, the camera light on. We had practised the anchor twice yesterday. We take 60 seconds before joining: 90s is not possible, but we press our wrist once while taking a 4:6 breath and name the memory sentence aloud (“Presentation to 30 colleagues; click of the slide”). We feel a small drop in adrenaline and a steadier tone in our voice. The meeting proceeds; we notice fewer filler words. We log in Brali: “Pre‑meeting mini anchor, felt steadier; confidence 7/10.”

We did the mini rehearsal because we planned for micro‑use; planning increased the chance we would use the anchor in the moment.

• Where exactly were you sitting/standing? Name three objects you can picture.
• What one small action did you take that mattered (e.g., pressed a button, took a breath)?
• What did your body do first? (shifted weight, steadied knee) Answering these in one sentence helps make the memory crisp.

Integrating with other practices (trade‑offs)
Combine this anchor with:

• A 60–90 second progressive muscle relaxation if you want more somatic grounding.
• A short planning checklist if the stressor is task complexity.

Trade‑off: adding practices increases time cost and complexity. Start simple with the memory + single tactile anchor. If we have more time, layer in breath or posture.

• Misconception: “I must remember a huge achievement.” Correction: Small, clear, personally meaningful episodes are better. A precise 90‑second memory of calmly closing an argument is superior to a fuzzy memory of “winning an award.”
• Misconception: “Anchors work like a switch forever.” Correction: The anchor is a practiced cue. Without rehearsal, the association weakens.
• Misconception: “I’ll use a positive thought instead.” Correction: Cognitive reframing can help, but embodied anchors combine sensory and motor networks, making the shift faster and often more robust under pressure.

• If a memory triggers unwanted emotions, stop, ground with a safe present moment (name five things you see), and pick another memory. We avoid trauma processing here.
• We do not recommend using this as the only tool for severe anxiety disorders; seek professional help when intrusive symptoms persist.

Progress tracking: what to count Pick one or two metrics to log in Brali:

• Metric A (count): Number of anchor rehearsals per week. Target: 12–18 in the first week.
• Metric B (minutes): Minutes of focused recall per day. Target: 5 minutes per day.

Why two metrics? Count gives frequency; minutes give depth. Either alone works; together they show both practice volume and rehearsal length.

• Day 1: 3 rehearsals (morning, midday, evening). Log each in Brali with a one‑sentence memory and confidence rating (0–10).
• Day 2: 3 rehearsals. Before a small challenge, use a 20s micro‑anchor (breath + wrist press).
• Days 3–4: 2 rehearsals per day. Try a rehearsal before a meeting or a small task.
• Days 5–7: 1 rehearsal daily (maintenance) + use on demand. By end of week: target ≥12 rehearsals, average confidence rating increased by at least 1–2 points.

Brali check‑ins and journaling routine We use Brali to collect micro‑data and to encourage repetition. A quick habit plan:

• Create a task: Anchor rehearsal — 90s, repeat 3× daily for 3 days.
• Create a check‑in: daily confidence rating (0–10) and count rehearsals completed.
• Journal: a single line summarizing the memory and situational use.

We will now show how to log the data in Brali: each rehearsal becomes a short entry with tags (anchor, confidence), used to chart progress over two weeks.

A candid reflection: boredom, friction, and friction removal Practice can feel repetitive. We notice that the friction to rehearse often bursts our plans: the phone is buzzing, the time is tight. We avoid friction by embedding rehearsals in existing routines — after making coffee, after a bathroom break, or right after logging morning tasks. If we cannot spare 90 seconds, we use the ≤5‑minute alternative below.

Alternative path for busy days (≤5 minutes)
When time is scarce, do a Compact Anchor:

• 30–60 seconds: pick one sensory detail, take 3 deep breaths (4 in / 6 out), press wrist once on the exhale.
• 10 seconds: name the memory aloud in a single sentence.
• 10 seconds: log a quick tag in Brali: “compact anchor done.” This path keeps continuity while respecting time constraints.

We recommend this compact version for travel, tight schedules, or initial practice. It is weaker per single attempt than the full 90s recall, but it preserves the cueing and prevents long gaps.

• If we repeat the compact anchor 3 times per day for 7 days: 3 × ~60s × 7 days = 21 minutes total practice that week.
• If we do the full 90s rehearsal 3 times per day for 7 days: 3 × 90s × 7 = 31.5 minutes total practice that week. Both are small time investments with potentially meaningful changes in state access.

Scaling up: when the anchor should evolve After 2–4 weeks of consistent use, consider evolving the anchor:

• Swap to a second memory (complementary skill: decisiveness vs. calm).
• Add a two‑word verbal cue to speed retrieval (e.g., “steady click” said under the breath).
• Move from wrist press to posture if we want a larger somatic shift.

We assumed one anchor suffices → observed varied contexts require different shades of resourcefulness → changed to a plan where we maintain one primary anchor and one secondary anchor.

If, after 10–14 rehearsals, the anchor feels weak:

• Check memory specificity: is there one clear visual detail? If not, re‑encode with 3 sensory labels.
• Check rehearsal spacing: are rehearsals bunched in a single block? If yes, spread them across the day.
• Check cue consistency: are we pressing the wrist differently each time? Try to keep pressure and placement constant.

A small experiment to run (5–10 minutes)
We suggest a simple within‑person experiment: for three days, do one rehearsal in the morning and one before a known stressor (call, meeting). Log confidence before and after each use. Compare average pre/post differences across days. If average post‑use confidence increases by at least 1 point, the anchor is probably working.

Cost–benefit arithmetic Time cost: 5–15 minutes per day in early learning. Benefit: faster access to feelings of capability, potentially reducing procrastination or performance errors. The trade‑off is small time investment for modest state improvements; this system works best when integrated into routine tasks.

• A product manager used the wrist anchor before weekly demos and reported fewer filler words and a 20% reduction in post‑meeting rumination over two weeks.
• A nurse used the anchor before difficult conversations and reported faster recovery from emotional escalations.
• A graduate student used the anchor before oral exams and reported an increase from 5/10 to 7/10 average confidence across three practices.

These are illustrative, not generalizable. We state them to show typical application contexts.

Check‑in Block (to add to Brali or paper)
Daily (3 Qs): [sensation/behavior focused]

Weekly (3 Qs): [progress/consistency focused]

Metrics:

• Primary: rehearsals per week (count).
• Secondary: minutes of focused recall per day (minutes).

• 12–18 rehearsals in week 1: learning range.
• Average post‑use confidence increase ≥1 point: meaningful short‑term effect.
• Maintenance: ≥2 rehearsals per week thereafter keeps the association active.

A final micro‑scene before we close We are two days into practice. Today, the meeting ran late and caffeine was low. We set a simple rule: before logging onto any call longer than 20 minutes, do a 20‑second compact anchor. That morning, with headphones warming our ears, we pressed the wrist once, whispered the sentence (“presentation click”), and joined the call. The first five minutes felt less jittery; our voice found steadier ground. We wrote a two‑line log in Brali and, crucially, we did it before we needed it, not after.

That preemptive habit — rehearse before the stressor — is the multiplier. If we wait until panic rises, the anchor works but more slowly. If we anticipate and prime, the anchor acts as an inoculation.

This is not a cure for performance anxiety or chronic low mood. It is a tool for acute state shifting and for building access to competent feelings. If anxiety persists or is debilitating, this practice should be adjunct to professional care. The main risk is misuse as a single solution for complex problems; the main limit is the size of the effect per rehearsal — it’s small but consistent with practice.

• Pair the anchor with an existing habit (habit stacking): after brewing coffee, perform a 90s rehearsal.
• Make a simple streak rule in Brali: three days in a row = small celebratory note in the journal.
• Use the weekly check‑in to celebrate small gains in rehearsal count and subjective shift.

We will start today, do the 6‑minute micro‑task, log it in Brali as “Anchor attempt 1,” and set three short reminders for the day: morning, mid‑day, evening. The goal is small: build the cue. The discipline is brief and concrete.

• Pick one concrete episode under five minutes.
• Recall with 60–90 seconds of sensory detail.
• Press the left wrist with the right thumb during recall and at the end.
• Repeat 3 times across the first day, track counts and minutes in Brali.

Mini‑App Nudge (again)
In Brali: create a repeating micro‑task "Anchor rehearsal 90s" at 09:00, 13:00, and 19:00 for three days. Use the completion to log confidence rating.

Check‑in Block (copy into Brali)
Daily (3 Qs):

Weekly (3 Qs):

Metrics:

• Rehearsals per week (count)
• Minutes of focused recall per day (minutes)

Alternative path for busy days (≤5 minutes)

• Compact Anchor: 30–60s total. Pick one sensory detail, 3 breaths (4 in/6 out), 1 wrist press, name the memory, tag in Brali.

— End of Hack №813